Stair Acrobatics
by Uh.yeah
Summary: Some TenRose randomness. Having survived so many alien adventures, Rose has her most trying accident... at home.


**A/N**: I don't know where this came from or even what it is. But then, what did you expect from me? I hope it's happily light and reasonably fun, though I don't think it's _quite _as fun as my others…

And... thanks to **eeveekitty85**. Thanks for that, man. Bless you. :D

**Disclaimer**: Doctor Who belongs to the BBC. But you knew that, didn't you?

* * *

"You ought to congratulate me, Rose." said the Doctor, looking round the Powell Estate, "I think this is the most accurate landing I've ever managed to make in the case of visiting your mother." A dark look passed over his face, "Your mother... Actually, Rose, I think I ought to mention - if she tries to kiss me I cannot be held responsible for my actions. You got that? Not responsible. No telling what I'd do. I mean, what is it with me and middle-aged women? You remember that mother of four back on Galansage? Couldn't keep her hands off me. And the other one - Cassandra…. Although, I suppose I can't help being irresistible…" 

"Would you," puffed Rose, just ahead of him, "shut up? If you're not going to help me carry this bag, you could at least open the bloody doors for me."

"Oh. Right. Sorry."

He hurried over to the main door and pulled it open for her, as she struggled through with the huge bag of dirty clothing.

"I suppose," he commented, as she began to labour up the stairs, "Just like they should fix the lift, here, I really ought to fix the washing machine on the TARDIS. That way, we could avoid these little trips. As much as I love visiting your mother…" He grimaced, "You did call ahead, didn't you? I quite like it when she has the tea all ready for us." He grinned to himself, "And those little chocolate biscuits. I really like those, actually. They don't half go well with a fresh cup of tea." He paused as Rose made a grunting noise just ahead of him, up the stairs. "What was that, Rose?" he asked, "I didn't quite catch that."

He never got an answer though, because a few seconds later, Rose went tumbling backwards down the stairs. Panicked, the Doctor made to go after her as she went flying past, but had to leap out the way as the large bag came rolling ominously behind her.

"You're right," he commented, as it thumped loudly on the steps, "That bag _was _heavy."

He had just started tearing down the stairs after her, his coat flying out, when he heard a high pitched shriek from somewhere at the top of the staircase.

He rolled his eyes, "Here we go," he muttered to himself.

"Rose!" screeched the voice, "Rose!"

"I'm down here, mum," she replied, slightly shakily, from the foot of the stairs.

The Doctor sighed inwardly, relieved at the sound of her voice.

"What did you do that, for?" asked the Doctor, as he neared the bottom and saw her sitting on the floor, slightly ruffled.

"Oh, you know, seemed like a bit of a laugh…. Anyway, it was your fault; you didn't open the door."

"Oh, sorry about that," apologised the Doctor, guiltily. He reached her and crouched down beside her, "You alright, you daft ape?"

"What the hell have you done to her?" Demanded Jackie Tyler, descending the stairs in a way which made the Doctor downright scared.

"All an accident, Jackie," he reassured her, smiling bravely, "I promise I didn't push her."

"You better not have," warned Jackie.

"No, no, she's fine." Said the Doctor, quickly, "All fine."

To emphasise his point, he reached out his arms to help Rose to her feet. Rose obliged, but breathed in sharply as she tried to move her right arm.

"Maybe not so fine," she winced.

"Ah," said the Doctor, gently lifting up her arm, "Broken wrist - poor you. But not to worry," he continued, hastily, glancing at Jackie's thunderous face. "One trip to the TARDIS med-lab and it'll be right as rain."

"I am not," said Jackie, enunciating clearly, "Having my daughter's broken arm fixed in your spaceship. She's going to hospital like any normal person."

"But I can fix it in a few minutes in the TARDIS!" Protested the Doctor.

"He's right, mum," said Rose, "The TARDIS would be much better."

"There's nothing wrong with the hospital here, sweetheart," said Jackie, offended, "They did a marvellous job when Marge's Timmy broke his leg. Do you remember that? A couple of weeks in plaster and he was fine. Even got to carry on with the football training."

"I can't have a plaster cast on for a couple of weeks!" exclaimed Rose.

"Everyone else has to," said Jackie, "And you're not so much better than the rest of us, just because you go off on your fancy… travels. No, you're going to the hospital and that's final."

"Mum," said Rose, patiently, "Why waste the doctors' time on my arm, when they could be dealing with someone else who's worse off? It'd be so much simpler to just take me to the TARDIS."

The Doctor smiled at her, proudly, but Jackie just looked even more determined.

"Rose, sweetheart, you are going to a hospital. You're a person just like the rest of us and you have a right to use the hospital. What I pay my taxes for, anyway."

"I think she said she wanted to go to the TARDIS," said the Doctor, pointedly, standing up.

"And I think I said she was going to hospital," replied Jackie. "She's my daughter and I think I get more of a say, thank you very much."

"And obviously, I respect that entirely… But I really think it would be better if we just got Rose back to the TARDIS and took her to the med-lab."

"I don't think so. You're not even a real doctor! And I'm not going to trust my daughter's healthcare to you. You're an alien, for God's sake."

"No need to get personal!"

"Enough!" Yelled Rose, silencing both Jackie and the Doctor, "Nice as it is to listen to you two bickering, I happen to be in a lot of pain here. I no longer care what you do, just please get it sorted."

The Doctor looked at Rose. "You mother wants you to go to hospital."

"You know it's useless to argue with her," said Rose, appealingly.

"Fine," sighed the Doctor, after staring at Rose for a few seconds, "Fine, fine, fine. But when we're still in the waiting room three hours later, don't come crying to me."

"Knew you'd see sense," beamed Jackie, "You're a lot more reasonable in this form, I think. Anyway, I need my car keys. You wouldn't mind popping up to get them, would you, Doctor?"

"I don't think that's a good idea," protested the Doctor, "I don't know where your car keys are. It'd just take longer."

"Well, I'd tell you where they are…"

"It'd just be quicker if you ran to get them," said the Doctor, firmly.

Jackie opened her mouth to protest, then sighed. "Fine. Be back in a second. Better take this bag, too, actually."

She hurried up the stairs, encumbered by the bag and the Doctor quickly crouched down next to Rose.

"Right, if we're quick, we can make a break for it, now." He said, urgently, "Come on, while she's gone, we'll take you back to the TARDIS, fix you up and everything will be hunky dory."

"Yeah," said Rose, "My mum will have a fit, call the police and probably slap you… Nah, I'll go to the hospital. She needs a chance to fuss over me. Least I can do, really. But you run off. Go back to the TARDIS or do something. Without getting in trouble, mind you."

The Doctor looked at her like she was stupid. "Rose, you've broken your wrist. Your mum's on the verge of becoming hysterical and the NHS can be a bit dodgy. I'm not going anywhere."

Rose took his hand in her left, "Thanks," she said quietly.

"No problem," he grinned. "How do you feel?"

"I've been better, thanks." she laughed, unsteadily.

"Typical," he said, shaking his head, "You're absolutely fine running from aliens and saving the world. But as soon as we take you home, you fall down the stairs and break your wrist. And, to be honest, you're very lucky you didn't break anything more. Told you coming home was dangerous. We'll have to do it less often, now." He smiled faintly, "Oh, I like the sound of that…"

"Alright, got them!" Called Jackie, out of breath and running down the stairs, "Let's get her in the car. Everything will be better soon, Rose, sweetie."

* * *

The Doctor was right - three hours and a lot of room pacing later they were still sitting in the waiting room. Only, he was so bored by then, he could gain no joy from "I told you so." 

By this time, Rose's arm had swelled to an alarming size. It was red and quietly throbbing in a way which made Rose grit her teeth and had turned her face quite pale. The Doctor knew she was in a lot of pain and was dying to take his Sonic Screwdriver to her wrist, but knew Jackie would be having none of it. So he had to content himself with holding her good hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze every now and again.

"Bloody woman," muttered Jackie, stalking back from the reception desk, "She's not doing a single thing. So we're all supposed to just sit here and wait till a doctor decides he can be bothered to see us? It's ridiculous. I don't know what this country's come to."

"Mum," said Rose, "All the doctors are working really hard. I think they're just a little understaffed."

"I know that, sweetheart, but I still think it's unfair to make you wait so long." She eyed Rose and the Doctor's linked hands, "Can't you do something?" She asked the Doctor.

"Me?" asked the Doctor, innocently, "I thought you were the one who was determined to do things the human way. And cutting the queue doesn't seem very British to me."

"Yes, well, my daughter's in pain and she's been waiting long enough."

The Doctor regarded Jackie's vehement face then glanced at Rose's pale, but bravely smiling, one.

"Alright," he said, giving Rose's hand one last squeeze before releasing it and standing up, "I'll see what I can -"

At that moment, though, he was interrupted by a nurse.

"Rose Tyler?" she asked, "The doctor will see you now."

"There," beamed Jackie, "I told you they'd come through, didn't I? Just required a bit of patience, that's all."

The Doctor stared on, his mouth still open as Jackie gently helped Rose up. Then, sighing to himself, he shook his head and followed them off down the hospital corridor.

* * *

Rose spent about half an hour with two nurses, watched by her mother and the Doctor. They sighed over her broken wrist before announcing that she had actually broken the bone just above the wrist, managing to move the bone and would require an X-ray. After which, they may require a specialist to manipulate the bone back into position before setting it in plaster. The Doctor listened to the news, with enforced calm. He wasn't sure how long they were going to have to spend in the human hospital, but by the sound of things, it would be a long, long time. 

"Excuse me," said a nurse, coming over to Jackie and the Doctor, "We'll have to ask you to leave now. We're going to take her along for her X-ray and then whatever procedure is necessary, following the results. I'm going to have to ask you to sit in the waiting room until things are finished."

Jackie sighed, and went over to kiss Rose goodbye.

"I'll see you when it's all sorted, ok?" She pointed at the Doctor, who stood resolutely in the corner of the room. "Come on," she ordered, "You heard the nurse: out."

The Doctor still made no move.

"I'm sorry, sir," apologised the nurse, "We really do need you to leave, now."

"Oh, right," he said, thinking hard, "Actually, I'm here to… inspect the hospital workings and monitor the staff's performance. Yeah. I am. Anyway, I've decided to assign myself to this case and see how you deal with a broken wrist - sorry, arm - as of Miss Tyler, here."

"Oh…" said the nurse, obviously confused and unsure whether to believe him.

"Don't worry," smiled the Doctor, reaching into his pocket, "I have all the necessary paperwork with me." He handed her the wallet and grinned briefly at Rose.

"Oh, sorry, Dr. Timmons," said the nurse, hastily, "Of course. I was a little surprised because we hadn't been briefed about this."

"I should think not," said the Doctor, "These visits are highly confidential. I would appreciate it if none of you mentioned this to your colleagues - it's important that I'm able to keep the staff on their toes."

"Of course, sir, I understand completely. I'll just go and inform the other doctors who may be working on this case. Excuse me."

The Doctor put the psychic paper back into his pocket and winked at the outraged Jackie, as she was led out of the room by another nurse.

* * *

The Doctor observed the X-raying and was called in to examine the result along with the other doctors. Actually, he had enjoyed that - ended up giving the doctors a brief lecture on unusual shapes in the pictures. He was present at the session where Rose was placed under anaesthetic and they manipulated the bone back into the correct position. The Doctor watched everything like a hawk - not because, as they assumed, he was assessing their performance, but because he needed to make sure there would be nothing he had to correct later. 

In fact, the Doctor was by her side every moment of her hospital visit, keeping the doctors in check and generally impressing them with his extensive knowledge. The only moment he nearly lost his cool was when they informed him that she would need to be kept in overnight for observation.

"Why?" he demanded, "Wouldn't be a lot better to just - I don't know - let her go home?

The hospital doctors eyed him nervously, as if he was asking them a trick question they needed to get right.

"Well, obviously, Dr. Timmons, we'll need to observe her. In case the bone we have just manipulated shifts over night and causes further complications. It would be dangerous to allow her release just yet."

"Right, of course," said the Doctor, recovering, "Very good. Well answered. If I had a gold star, I would give you one."

They placed the still sleeping Rose in a hospital bed, in a private room - courtesy of Dr. Timmons' visit. Once Jackie was firmly established at her daughter's side, the Doctor went off in search of the café, in order to avoid facing Jackie quite so soon.

He wandered off, thinking the worst part was over and soon everything would be back to normal. Or, at least, as normal as things can be onboard a space and time machine. But, really, he should have known better. Because while he had been at Rose's side through all the medical procedures, Jackie had channelled her frustration at having to wait while the Doctor didn't, into calling up all of Rose's friends and family and telling them the news.

So when the Doctor returned, a little while later and feeling better for a rubbish cup of tea served in a polystyrene cup, he was somewhat taken aback to find Rose's peaceful little room completely full of people. And, from what he could gather, a lot of people who were either clones of Jackie, or - judging by the shrieks - Rose's bestest best friends in the whole entire world. Needless to say, it was not the best situation to find himself in.

A hush descended as he entered the room, and several pairs of eyes turned to stare at him.

"Is that him?" Came a female voice from the corner.

"Yeah," said Jackie, arms folded, "That's the one."

"Hello," said the Doctor, grinning and waving at the room full of people, "I'm the Doctor. Nice to meet you all…"

They all nodded back, clearly not quite sure what to make of him, yet. At a loss as to what to do next, the Doctor decided to ignore everyone else and concentrate on Rose. The small crowd of people parted slightly to allow him over to the bed.

"See you've finally woken up," grinned the Doctor.

"Sorry," she whispered, quietly, once he was close enough.

"No problem," he smiled, understanding what she meant, "Just consider it as one more alien gathering I have to survive."

"Shut up," laughed Rose.

He grinned at her. "Ok?" He asked, quietly.

"Fine," she smiled back. "Thanks for staying with me and everything."

"Well, the hospital needed inspecting. Seemed as good a time as any." He paused before adding in a low voice, "We'll get that properly sorted as soon as we're back on the TARDIS."

Rose nodded her head, happily. Their brief interlude was interrupted, however, by Rose's friends. They believed they had left the two of them alone for long enough and they were now determined to meet the Doctor.

The Doctor plastered an alarmingly pleasant grin on his face and steeled himself to answer all their questions.

* * *

A few hours later, the large party had finally left. Somewhat dishevelled, the Doctor sank down into an armchair at Rose's side, previously host to one of Rose's older aunts. Just he, Jackie and Rose remained in the room, thanks to Dr. Timmons' persuasive powers. 

"You did well," said Rose, reassuringly, "Everyone loved you."

"God," he groaned, "Your lot, you don't half know how to-" he trailed off as he felt Jackie's eyes on him, "Don't half know how to offer love and support in times of crisis…"

"Yeah, well, we're all good friends, aren't we?" said Jackie, "Anyway, I suppose I ought to thank you Doctor."

"Thank me?" asked the Doctor, slightly shocked.

"Yeah," said Jackie, "For staying with her and getting her the room. And then making them let us stay overnight. Thanks."

"Right," said the Doctor, taken aback, "Well, you're very welcome."

"Aw, look at you two," teased Rose, "Almost getting along… God, this is a weird situation. I have to stay in bed. And what, you two are going to stay in here? All night?"

"Of course," said Jackie, "You're my daughter."

"And I have to keep an eye on you in case you end up getting into any more trouble," justified the Doctor, though his reasons didn't seem all that sound to him. "Anyway, no trouble. Your mum's got the most the comfortable chair, obviously. But that's alright. I don't need much sleep, really. And I see your considerate friends have left a couple of copies of Heat and other literary gems. So everything's going to be fine." He grinned, reassuringly.

"You should get some sleep, sweetheart," advised, Jackie. "You've been through quite a lot."

"Not really," said Rose, "I only broke my arm. Though why they had to plaster all the way down my hand, I have no idea."

Jackie rolled her eyes, "I'm only saying. You had a nasty accident and then an operation. You need to sleep."

But in the end, it was Jackie who fell asleep first. Unattractively lolling her head to one side, mouth slightly open.

"Bless her," said Rose, fondly, "She's tired herself out, worrying."

"All of which could have been spared if she'd only let you go to the med-lab."

"Maybe. But give her a break. She's my mum and wanted to do what she thought best."

"I know, I know," soothed the Doctor, "And now, can I ask - would you mind not doing that again, please? Or, if you insist on more stair acrobatics, not in such close proximity to your mother."

"Oi!" laughed Rose, "It wouldn't have happened if you'd just stopped talking and given me a hand."

"I can't help it," said the Doctor, defensively, "The things I say are very important. I just sometimes take a while to get to the point."

"Yeah, yeah," said Rose, "You just like to babble. Admit it."

"I do not babble!" Protested the Doctor, "I muse over lots of different things, in the course of one speech. I'd say it's more 'philosophical' than 'babble'. In fact, Plato and Socrates agreed with me. They said I had great potential as a philosopher, when I met them. They also said I had great potential as an athlete, but that's besides the point. Though there's no denying that I'm a damn fine runner… Anyway, the thing is that they obviously believed I was highly intelligent and you'd do well to remember it, because you don't argue with two blokes of that kind of-"

He broke off as Rose cleared her throat. She raised her eyebrows at him, a knowing grin on his face.

"Ok," he sighed, resignedly, "Maybe I do babble a little. But," he continued, trying to ignore Rose's triumphant laugh, "At least I don't have a stupid plaster cast on my arm." He knocked the plaster, disapprovingly. "Hang on," he said, looking a little more closely, "What's this?"

"My mates signed it," explained Rose, as the Doctor took out his glasses.

"'_Dear Rose_,'" he read, "'_Trust you to go and do this to yourself within five minutes of coming back home. Hope you get better soon, love Jen xxx' _Well, that's nice of her. '_Rose, you muppet. You managed to break your arm while sober? What's wrong with you? Anyway, hope you get well soon, though this may give you a welcome break from all your hectic travelling. I expect a long call any day now, containing all the sordid details... S. xxx'" _The Doctor raised his eyebrows at Rose, "Well, what on Earth are you going to tell _her_?" he demanded.

Rose giggled, "I don't know. I reckon I could tell her the truth… Or make something up to keep her happy. We'll see."

The Doctor shook his head and went back to reading all the messages.

"Aren't you going to sign it?" Asked Rose, watching him, sleepily.

"Hang on," said the Doctor, "I haven't finished reading everyone else's messages yet."

Rose watched him for a while longer, before drifting peacefully off to sleep. Once he was certain she was completely unconscious, the Doctor took a felt tip pen from one of his pockets and thinking hard, began to write.

* * *

"Right," said the Doctor, once Jackie had handed the Doctor Rose's bag of freshly cleaned clothes, "We'd better be off." 

"I still think you should stay till her arm's better," said Jackie, folding her arms.

"We really can't wait, mum," said Rose, "We've got too many things to do."

"Like what?" demanded Jackie.

"Oh, you know," said Rose, "Planets to visit, new things to see."

"Worlds to save," added the Doctor, casually.

"Well there'll be none of that going on, I hope," said Jackie, warningly, "The doctors - _proper _doctors, might I add - said she was to do nothing strenuous till the plaster was off. I don't want you messing her arm up any further."

"Don't you worry," reassured the Doctor, "I will make sure she doesn't move that plaster-encased arm to so much as make a cup of tea. Not that she could even do that if she tried - they've plastered over her entire hand! I'm still not sure if they just did that for a laugh." He cleared his throat, serious again, "Anyway, Jackie, I'll take care of her."

Jackie narrowed her eyes at him, before pulling him into a tight hug,

"Alright, then, you," she said, squeezing him even tighter, "But don't wait so long to visit me again, ok?"

"No," gasped the Doctor, struggling to breathe as she released him, "We won't."

Jackie went over and hugged Rose, tightly.

"Look after yourself, sweetheart," she said.

"Always do, mum," answered Rose, smiling.

"And off we go," said the Doctor, struggling to keep a note of relief out of his voice. With some difficulty, he lifted the huge bag. "Blimey," he puffed, "I'm tempted to just hurl this down the stairs. Probably be safer than carrying it." He thought for a few minutes. "Nah, better not. Would only end up hitting someone."

"Well take the lift, then," said Jackie, despairingly, "It's been fixed, now."

"Oh, right, of course." Frowned the Doctor. "Come on, you." He nodded at Rose.

Jackie saw them to the door of the flat, before rushing to the window and waiting till they entered the TARDIS. She watched, sadly, as the TARDIS disappeared. Then she rallied her spirits a little, before padding softly off to ring her friend, Marge and have a long discussion about the state of the NHS.

Inside the TARDIS, the Doctor had taken off his coat and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well," he said, "I never thought we were going to get out of that hospital. Just seemed to be the kind of building where you go in and spend the rest of your life waiting to be called by a doctor, never to see the light of day again… Actually, I've been somewhere like that before. Can't think where it was exactly… Some planet North of Viasera, I'd imagine… Anyway," he looked at Rose, where she stood awkwardly with her arm in plaster, "You go and wait for me in the med-lab while I just dump this bag in your room. Ok?"

"Alright." And Rose, headed off down the corridor, hoping the TARDIS would show her where she wanted to go.

The Doctor sighed and heaved the bag again. "I am far too good to her," he grimaced, before smiling to himself.

In the med-lab, Rose sat on the bed, studying her plaster case. She paused when she got to a neatly written message in red felt tip pen:

"_To my stupid, little ape: Please don't do this again - not the cleverest thing you've ever managed to do. But I hope it doesn't hurt too much and I promise it'll all be fixed up soon. Your Doctor_." And then, as if unsure of themselves, three little x's had been scrawled underneath.

Rose laughed to herself. It wasn't the most sentimental message she had ever received, but it was good enough for her.

"Alright, then," grinned the Doctor, entering the med-lab, "The Doctor is in the building. Can we finally sort all this out? Or would you rather keep that cast on for a couple of weeks, just like Marge's footballing Jimmy or Timmy or whatever the hell his name was?"

"No thanks," laughed Rose, "I'll have it off, please. So long as you can cut the cast off carefully. I'd quite like to keep it…"

"Why, of course, Madame," said the Doctor, "With state of the art sonic technology, I can remove the cast so precisely, that very little damage will be done at all. And then fix the broken bone, obviously. Though, I won't be doing that with the Sonic Screwdriver."

Rose grinned, relieved.

"Can't wait to have this off," she said, excitedly, as the Doctor set to work on the cast with the Sonic Screwdriver.

The Doctor grinned up at her, "Oh, I am glad to hear that," he said, "After all, you'll need your hand to save the Universe."

* * *

Ah, rather long for a random story. Anyway, please, please review. You may as well, especially after reading all that…. 

And, actually, title suggestions would be quite welcome, too…


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